According to the Daily Mail, the BBC has “enraged Muslim staff” by holding a hog roast to celebrate the end of the Commonwealth Games directly under the window of the Arabic TV service.

A BBC spokesman, who chose to remain anonymous, said he couldn’t see what all the fuss was about. “The BBC has been absolutely full of useless pigs with their snouts in the public trough for years.”

When asked about exactly what was going to accompany the succulent pork, the BBC spokesman said he was unable to reveal his sauces.